It helps me to let go of things that I can't handle or things that make me upset. So I begin to type and let my fingers do the rest. I've been blessed with this gift that I intend on sharing. I love to do it. It's my passion. Even if I haven't studied it in school and I don't currently have a degree, I can still say it - I'm a writer.
When my grandpa died, I remember scribbling song lyrics in my yellow notebook every day after school. I would write these lyrics that meant so much to me, but looking back on them they really were so awful. And that was the spark that led to the fire I had inside me for writing. I never stopped. It was my therapy. I would lose a close friend - then I'd write. I would get a bad grade in a class - I'd write. I would experience one of the happiest day of my life - I'd write until my fingers bled. It was something that was always there for me when I felt alone.
For a while in High School I had stopped. It wasn't the cool thing to do. Admitting that you love to write made you weird or friendless. So I stopped. Those were a lonely couple of years. I missed my imagination. I missed the way a pen felt in my hand when I scribbled words across a piece of paper. I missed lying awake until 3am writing about these characters I had created in my head. Until I had found a piece of the puzzle that I had been missing for so long: God.
The Bible says that each of us has a God given gift. Something that God has blessed us with to share with other people and to give Him the glory for. That was my missing puzzle piece. The piece that I needed to ignite that spark I had for writing so many years ago.
I didn't care anymore. I wanted to do what I loved. I wasn't going to stop writing just to please anyone but my creator.
Why am I writing this, you ask? Well, mostly because it's been a rough couple of days and I've realized that I had quite a bit of built up frustration stirring inside of me. And this helped. It may not have fixed the situation that I'm in, it still helped me figure a few things out.
Life is funny that way, huh? We sure do serve an awesome God.
